Why People Don't Drink Budweiser Anymore
Another day another blog entry I guess. I desperately need sunglasses and more beer right now. I’m sitting on my back porch drinking my last Yuengling and debating whether or not I want to drive down the road to buy a case of Budweiser. I had my first Bud heavy in years at a Rolling Stones concert the other day and was pleasantly surprised by it. Considering I drank my last few through a funnel, I don’t think I gave America’s beer its due. It is funny though because I can’t stand the taste of Bud Light. I always figured Bud light was just a watered down version of Bud heavy… I guess it could still be true and maybe they just live in an area with shitty water. I think they have a factory in Newark New Jersey, and I did get led poisoning when I lived there. Is that the difference? Who knows? Does it even matter? Probably not.
It is funny to think about how Beer has changed. When our parents were kids, everyone drank Budweiser and Miller. Life was simple. Beer was just that, beer. Today, it’s all about craft and artisanal beers. I date a girl (Nice Raoul! Way to work that back in!) who drinks IPAs and Sours. She had me try one with a monkey in the name and it tasted like watered down battery acid– man my eyes are killing me. I’m going to need to hurry this along or take a break and find glasses at a certain point. It is just getting miserable…
Okay. I found a pair of glasses. My aviators were nowhere to be found, which is unfortunate because these make me look like a homosexual Robocop when paired with my mustache.
Anyway, the beer market has shifted. People don’t want to drink lagers anymore. They are either too basic or have too many calories. They either want something light or artisanal. It’s actually amazing that they continue to make beers like Miller Highlife and Budweiser anymore. All anyone buys and all anyone advertises are light beers. The Bud Knight has never appeared in a Budweiser commercial. The last Miller Highlife commercial that I saw was about 6 years ago when they tried to deem it the Champaign of beers. What they failed to understand in trying to relate to the hipster demographic is that beers made by MillerCoors and Anheuser Busch are far too mainstream for their aesthetic. It doesn’t matter what you call them. If you can’t brag about your beer’s abv or weird flavor fusion, then you lose street cred in the hipster world. It’s just one of those facts. My generation, Gen Z, and the millennials that came before us have lost interest in normal beer. They want beer infused with lemonade or pumpkin depending on the time of year. Hell, even I like some flavored beers on occasion. At Christmas time, all I ever seem to drink is Shiner Holiday. I walked out with a crate filled with six-packs one time because my local liquor store at the time didn’t sell them in any greater quantities.
That said, I don’t get carried away with the flavors. Most of the time I drink Yuengling or Shiner Bock if I have any money laying around. My former roommate, however, embodies today’s beer market perfectly. He would never drink a lot of beer and would only buy ones that came in six-packs. They always had some sort of odd flavoring, two of which I remember distinctly: Chocolate peanut butter and watermelon. What kind of depraved sadist would make either a chocolate peanut butter or watermelon beer? I have no idea, but if I ran society, they would be placed on a heavy regiment of anti-psychotics. Plain and simple. He claimed to enjoy the chocolate peanut butter, and although he did not care for the watermelon IPA, he didn’t appear to hate it. Both of these made me want to vomit when I tried them. I guess that just means I’m too cool for all of this… Maybe by drinking normal beer I have become the king hipster? The one true hipster who rediscovered Budweiser? Maybe.
In a lot of ways, I understand these shifts in taste. Our generation cares a lot more about counting calories and carbs, so it makes sense that “beers” Michelob Ultra have risen to prominence. They even appeal to those of us who don’t count calories, because you can drink twice as many without achieving any sort of full feeling. You would never want to do a case race with something like Bud heavy. It would be grueling. That’s why you use Natural Light. They have the same alcohol content, so if the end result is the same, then why bother drinking the heavier version.
I understand the logic of it. I still prefer actual lagers to light beer, but what do I know? The masses clearly have spoken on this one. I am most definitely a part of a dying breed here.
PS: Congrats to the US Women’s Soccer team for winning the World Cup. I didn’t watch a single game, but I am a huge Alex Morgan fan so there you go. Congrats!